The Firstling ∕ Erstling ∕ He Complex

has 33 witnesses
                                           
XWitness
HEFIRSTFIRST BORN.ERSTLING KLANG.
LOVE.
LoveERSTE LIEBE.CHESTHEARTAPENDICITIS
Alternate spelling: APPENDICITIS
FirstlingHeFIRSTLING HEERSTLINGFIRSTLINGErstling
c
This whole version is lightly crossed out on the manuscript page. To increase legibility, we have chosen to show those words in the transcript that the Baroness deleted before she crossed out the entire version.
 
OR:FIRST LOVE.
 
HAB DICH LIEB GEWONNEN -HAB 'DICH' LIEB'HAB DICH LIEB GEWONNEN - GEWONNENHAB DICHDICH LIEB DICH GEWONNEN - [I] have come to love you -Now I have come to love youNUN SOHAB ICH DICH LIEB GEWONNEN NUN HAB ICH DICH LIEB GEWONNEN WOE
 
TRAUM KLANGSCHWANGVORBEI-Dream swung by -TRAUM,' SPRPFIFFCHWANG VORBEISCHWANG SCHWANG ALL'VORBEIDream swept byDream swung byTRAUM VORBEI -Dream goneALL IST VORBEI -All is goneUNDWIE NUN SO IST NUN ALLES VORBEIWhy is now all gone past[It is all] over -DARHIERAUF IST ALLES VORBEIThereupon all has passedALLES IST VORBEIEverything is gone LO
 
?? SPUKGESTALT ZERONNEN GLÜCK SPRANG ZERRONNEN - GLÜCK KLANG SPRANGRANG RANG ZERRONNEN -Happiness sprung dissolved -Apparition dissolved -Happiness sprungGLÜCK' BEGONNEN -Happiness rang, dissolved DIESPUKGESTALT ZERONNEN -GLÜCK KLANG - ZERONNEN -ZERRONNEN DER TRAUM ZERRONNENWIE EIN GEBILDWIE EIN GEBILD ZERRONNENDissolved the dream Like an apparition dissolvedApparition dissolved -SPUK?? GEBILD ZERONNENSpectre faded awayHAB[I] HaveHEHE LOVE LOVE LoveLIKISS SUNSUN SUN RAYSLOVEHEHe
 
Dissolved
 
SUN LOVEGLIEDER SCHWER BLEI - Limbs heavy lead - Limbs heavy lead.Limbs - lead.GLIEDER' SCHWERGLIEDER SCHWER' BLEIGLIEDER - KALT - BLEI -GLEIDER - KALT BLEI Limbs - cold lead. SINDDIE GLIEDER MIR SCHWER WIE BLEIWIE EIN HIRNGES PINHSTDIE DIE GLIEDER SIND SCHWER WIEVON BLEIAre limbs heavy like lead[My] limbs are as heavy as leadBLEIGLIEDER SIND BLEI - ALTLead-limbs - old

DICHCome to CAME Came TO - Came SHONE RAY LOVE WHEELED CAME TO LOVE THEECAME TO LOVEc
These lines and words in English appear, all crossed out, at the bottom of a version of the poem in German. Their random order reflects a possible brainstorming cluster that can be associated with many versions within the general complex.
 
From the blood vessel tree the bitterVOM ADER??BAUM DAS BITTREVOM ADERBAUM DAS BITTREVOM ADERBAUM DAS BITTREOf veintree coldFrom the blood vessel tree the bitterEs istSOSEHR KALT IST ESDASS ICH ZITTREES IST SO KALTBIN ICHDASS WON ICHICH ZITTREAm I - - I shudderWEIS - EIS -IceEIS IN SCHNEEIce in snowSo cold it is, I shudderLIEBLove TORE Tore Tore CLIPPED
RIPPED
RIPPEDPASTDREAM TORE PASTDREAM RANGPURREDSIFTED WALKED PASTDREAM TORE PAST
 
INIce -Ice -GEWONNEN -

You -

SPOKE RAY RAY - SPICE PAST Past -WOE
 
SPICEDB B RIMFLASH BRIM SPICED BLOWNSCHNEE -Snow -TRAUMDream PAST Past WOE LOWOE WOE
 
BRIM KISS SPICEHERZ HERZ -Heart -BRICHT AB DUMPFThe heart contracts -HERZ BRICHT AB IM LEIB IN DEM LEIBHeart breaks off in my bodyHeart breaks offHERZ IM GELDES BLUTHERZ IM BLUTHeart in bloodHeart in money's bloodHERZ BRICHT ABHERZ BRICHT AUS DEMVOMLEIBAB Heart breaks offDAS HERZ VEREIST IM LEIBMEINDAS HERZ ERFRIERTVEREIST IM LEIBThe heart turns to ice in my bodyMy heart turns to ice inside [my body]KLANGRang BLOWN BLOWN Blown BLOWING * BLOWNGINGBLOWING Blown ROSE ROSE ROSEROSEROSEROSE
 
SCHRUMFTKALT - DEIN
 
IMVORBEI -Past -PETROSE ROSE Petrose Rose SPRAYEARTHHEART ROSE ROSEROSEBLOODBlown BLOWN
 
Rose BLOWN BLUT BLUT -Blood -

HAPPINESS SPRANG SCATTERED SPILLED RUNNING LEFTGLÜCK BlissREELED
 
WEH - This -DASThatHurt that does.DAS MACHT DAS [. . .] BITTRE IM MEINEM BLUTADER NETZ - DAS BITTRE That does the [. . .] bitterIn [my] vein-net -- the bitterSPRANGBurstPET WAY ' WAY - WAY Way CAST .MEMBERS HEAVY CASTFROM LEAD CASTAWAY IT CASTWOE
 
DAS Does -TUTDoesZERRONNEN - Melted away - CAST CAST Cast -.

BLUSH SPILLEDWOEWOE SO WOE SOBLOODVEIN BLOWN
 
VEIN BRIMBRIM BLOWNKALTVEIN BLOWN SMART SPILLED TUT! GLIEDERLimbsKISS FRAYED

FRAYED
RUSHBLOWN !Rushblown!BLOWN

BRIM BLOWNBLOOD RUSH BLUSH BLOOD BLOWN
WEH.Hurt
 
BLOOD SPICE c
This is one of the few notes that the Baroness adds in cursive. These additions only appear in this version.
ISTSLAIN SPILL SHILLEDDOH! THATAGONE !AGONEAgeone! A-gone! a
(FROM: GOING)
WEH - Hurt -SCHWERHeavy WOE SMART
 
BLAST c
This is one of the few notes that the Baroness adds in cursive. These additions only appear in this version.
CHILL HEARTDAS.VEIN SMART SPICEBRIMPROUDRimproudBLEI.

Lead

LIGHTBLOODHEART KISSKISS WOE BETRAYEDBEFTRAYED BETRAYED

- - -
OHN DICHEIN SONNENBLUTSCHEIN GESTALT - Without your sun-figure BLUTSONN ICHBlood-sun, without youDASS ICH OHN DICH VERBLEIBBLUTSONNE - ICH ERZITTREBLUTSONN OHN DICH - ICH ZITTREBloodsun- I am tremblingThat I remain without youOHN DICH BLUTSONN ICH ZITTREWithout you Bloodsun, I trembleBlood-sun without you - [I] shiver
 
WAS KALT ISTKALTCold WEH DAS TUT

SPILLEDIS BLOWN IS SMARTITItEISIceICE IN SNOWSPICE ICE WOELO! LOBUT - LO BUT - LO LO Lo !

BETRAYED BUT -Toward [my] graveIN'S GRAB.

ZITT'RE OHN DICH ZUM GRAB ICH
KALTI head towards [my] grave

 
BLEIB
 
[Knowledge] sun-songERKENNTNISS SONNSANG OHN DEIN GESTALT[Without your Being's] radianceVASTPAIN BLEIBLEIDStay Pain

SHONE SHONE !Shone !SHONEINIn ICY ICY FROZE RED CHILLIN SNOWICY Icy WARTWARTWIRB - STIRB -Court - die -DASS
Alternate spelling: DAS
ICH OHN DICH VERBLEIB
That I without you remain
 
SHONEc
This is one of the few notes that the Baroness adds in cursive. These additions only appear in this version.
WOEWIRB - STIRB NUN HAB ICH DICH LIEB GEWONNENNow I have come to love youREDNOW VASTAVAST -AvastAVASTSCHNEE -Snow - WART Wart WARTSMART c
The word "wart" may be a play on "wert" -- "icy / [you] were / [you] froze . . ." that Freytag-Loringhoven adapted later as a metaphor for "heart."
WIRB - STIRB -Court - die -
 
DOG
 
VAST
 
RED AVASTWIRB - STIRB WILLDASS
Alternate spelling: DAS
SO IST NUN ALLES VORBEI
That is now all gone
ISATONE -Atone -FROZEHEARTFROZE FROZEFROZEFroze FROZE FROZE LONE SHRUNKHERZHeart HEART HEART HEARTICH FÜR IHN IMMERI for him always
 
BLOOD AGONE BLOOD HEARTFROZEIMMER AlwaysHEPAINSPILLED HEARTINInIN WOEWoefullWOEFROZEFroze ARIDKISSES BLOODICH DEIN - DU MEINI yours - you mine
 
Heart -EARTH
 
SHONEc
This is one of the few notes that the Baroness adds in cursive. These additions only appear in this version.
AGONE
FÜR IMMERForever FROZE -
 
BRIMPROUD ICH DEIN -I yours -ATONEWOEFULLIMInWOEFULL FLAYED FLAYED SHORN SLAIN TORN FLAYEDAridARIDHEART-SPILLEDICH - SOMMER WINTER - HERZI - summer winter - heart
 
IT DU MEIN You mineFASTWILLINGANONEFROZE SHILLEDROSES -RosesBLUT -Blood - BLOODHEART

.Heart.HEART
WOE LO SO FLAYED. LIEB LACHEN SCHMERZ - LUST - WEINENLove lust - laughter pain
 
LONE
 
HEART HEARTSHOWNE IMMERForeverINFLUSH -Flush -- - - -- - - -TODNOT - MICHDeath - me
 
LASTICH - SOMMER - WINTER - I - summer - winterROSESESTRIM TrimSHORNWEH -Hurt -MORGEN KÜSS WIEDERTomorrow kiss again
 
TO LAST AVAST HERZ Heart -SOWNBF LUFFSH
LUSHBLO
E 'NOUGH'NoughDAS -That -TORNVASTROT ICH DICHRed I you n
A possible reading of this line could be "Tomorrow [I] kiss you red again" but the Baroness is playing in this version with who is kissing whom.
 
HE LOVE DOESQUAL STRAHLPain rayANONESHL ILLEDTOToTUT! Does! ALLES GESCHIEHT[All happens]
 
WILLTRIMLIEB Love's torment
 
ENOUGHLUST - LACHEN - SCHMERZSRAHL NOT -Lust - [laughter - hurt]KILLEDBLAST -Blast -ININ MEINEM ARMEN ALLHAND[In my arms] In mine hand
 
ATONE TO AVASTMICH -Me -TILLTillGESCHIEHT ALL ALLSPOTT GLÜCK Happens happiness
 
BLAST CRASH BLAST

MORGEN KÜSS WIEDERWIEDER ROTTomorrow kiss again redLONELAST -CLAST LASTHEIL PEST SPOTTSalvation - plague - jest
 
TILLICH DICH - WIEDERI youHUSHHushAM ZENIT STEHT ICHIn the zenith stand
 
LAST HUSHIN MEIN HANDFLÄCHTELLERGESCHIEHTWACHSTIn my palm [happens] growsOVERCASTOvercast -ICHFEST GOTTI fast God
 
?? BLUFF LAST LAST HUSHGLÜCK - HEIL - PEST SPOTTHappiness - salvation - jest - plagueGRIMGrim
 
OVERCASTMIT FEST[In the zenith] with firmLOVE .Love .
 
. . AM ZENIT FESTa
GOTT = MAN x WEIB = ALLEINS = ANFANG ?? NICHTS ALL WAS DAZWISCHEN ??LIGHT DAS IST VOM ÜBEL. [This addition is discussed in the introduction and shown in Figure 8.
 
GRIMSTEHT
 
LOVE ICH GOTT Stood God: I -
 
E.E.v.FLc
The small fragment at the bottom of the page is not a version of this poem:
GELD IST DASEIN [Money is Being]
GELD MUSS DASEIN [Money must be there]
ZUM DASEIN [for Being]
It continues with a variety of endings concerning death.
 
V.
 
F.
 
L.

 
CAME TO LOVEUP
 
HELIALO BLOWN -
 
VEIN KISS SMELL RED
 
SPILLED
 
DREAM TORE WALKED PASTVEIN FROZEBLOOD
 
SHILLED
 
BLOOD RED TRAILED SWEPT DROPPEDFROZE
 
VAST
 
. . . .FROMLEAD CAST AWAY, IT CAST
 
ICY IN SNOW ICE IN SNOW
 
HEART IN WOE IN WOE
 
FROZE FROZE
 
HEART HEART

"HE" AND "FIRSTLING"
THESE TWO POEMS ARE SAME. I LEAVE IT TO YOU - IF YOU WILL PRINT BOTH? WITH THAT
 
"FLAYED HEART -
 
FROZE - - -.

I CONSIDER IT SINGULAR STRONG ENOUGH - TO COUNTENANCE THE SHRIVELING OF THE HEART TO THE SEMBLANCE AND USELESS APENDIX
Alternate spelling: APPENDIX
OF THE HEART.
(IN HERE: "BLOWN"
BETTER? "BLOWN"
ROSE
INSTEAD OF
"BLOWING ?

ROSE?"
IT IS GREAT DIFFERENCE
IN SOUND AND MEANING.
IN ATTITUDE.
BLOWING IS ROMANTIC
BLOWN IS FACT
I THINK: BLOWN!
AM UNCERTAIN.
DECIDE.
IT IS SAME POEM. PRINT BOTH - OR ONE OF THEM - WICH
Alternate spelling: WHICH
ONE - YOU MUST SELECT.
GLÜCK SPRANGSCHWANG VORBEI
TRÄUME -- BEGONNEN
GLÜCK TRAUM BEGONNEN
Happiness swung by
[Blissdreams]
Dreams begun

Happiness . . . begun
3 Heart
2 Shilled
VAST
1 ICE
 
SLAINREDTO
 
BLASTBLOWNBED
 
ANONEFROMRED
 
TILLVEINKISSES
 
LASTHOW SPILLED
 
??VAST FROZE
 
??IS BED SHILLED FROZE
 
TRIM PAIN

FROZE KILLED VASTICE
 
THATS VAST
 
HIMLONE
 
TRIMFROZE
 
ENOUGHBEDFLASH
 
GRIM GRIMSPILLED
 
BLUFF LOVERED
 
LOVE TO BLASTFROZE

 
BLAST BEDFLASH
 
TILL LAST SPILLED
 
BLUFF RED
 
OVERCAST FROZE
 
BRIMMING

 
RED
 
SPILLED
 
VEIN

 
HEART
 
SPILLED
 
RED
 
SHILLED
 
FROZE
 
KILLED
 
LONE
 
VAST

 
BED
 
SPILLED
 
RED
 
FROZE
 
FROZE
 
ICE

DJUNA - I SEND YOU THIS - YOU WILL SCARCELY RECOGNIZE IT - THE ENGLISH WAS SUCH MISSTEP THAT ONLY CAN HAPPEN HERE - IN GERMANY WHERE I AM FLUSTERED FRUSTRATED - BY PROFOUND SCARE - UNREST. WITH ALMOST SUPERHUMAN LABOR - MISERY - I FIXED IT - FOR I WAS ASHAMED - ANXIOUS. I CAN NOT LAST THUS LONG - DJUNA! AND YET - I HAVE NO MESSAGE - YET! A POEM LIKD THAT - THOUGH FAULTLESS NOW - SHOULD NOT COST ME SO DEAR! THE GERMAN - FIRST VERSION - ALWAYS WAS TOUCHING PATHETIC NAIV - FINISHED. WHAT IS INTERRESTING
Alternate spelling: INTERESTING
ABOUT THE 2 TOGETHER- IS THEIR VAST DIFFERENCE OF EMOTION - TIME KNOWLEDGE - PAIN. THAT IS - WHY THEY SHOULD BE PRINTED TOGETHER.
FOR THEY ARE 1 + 2 THE SAME POEM - PERSON - SENTIMENT LIFE STRETCH BETWEEN ONE - DIVIDED - ASSEMBLED - DISSEMBLED. THE GERMAN ONE RIPE - EXPERIENCED - BITTER. THE GERMAN ONE IS RAW DEEP WOE OF CHILD - IN WHOMS VERY VERY VIOLENCE THUS NAIVE EXPRESSED - LINGERS BALM OF RECOVERY SENSIBLE - THE ENGLISH ONE - AS IS SUPERFLUOUS TO POINT OUT - IS GRIM - SOPHISTICATED.
YES DJUNA - IT IS THAT "WOEFULL WART" POOR DEAR SUFFERING FRIEND! I COULD BURST OUT LAUGHING - IF IT WERE NOT SO TRULY FIGURATIVE IN ITS VERY DISTORTION! FOR - THAT NOW - HERE - IS MY HEART. IT IS INDECENT TO BEHOLD.
HOW IS SWEET DEAR LITTLE SARAH FREEMAN?
SHE DID NOT WRITE. OH! KISS HER.
XWitness
HEFIRSTFIRST BORN.ERSTLING KLANG.
LOVE.
LoveERSTE LIEBE.CHESTHEARTAPENDICITIS
Alternate spelling: APPENDICITIS
FirstlingHeFIRSTLING HEERSTLINGFIRSTLINGErstling
c
This whole version is lightly crossed out on the manuscript page. To increase legibility, we have chosen to show those words in the transcript that the Baroness deleted before she crossed out the entire version.
 
OR:FIRST LOVE.
 
HAB DICH LIEB GEWONNEN -HAB 'DICH' LIEB'HAB DICH LIEB GEWONNEN - GEWONNENHAB DICHDICH LIEB DICH GEWONNEN - [I] have come to love you -Now I have come to love youNUN SOHAB ICH DICH LIEB GEWONNEN NUN HAB ICH DICH LIEB GEWONNEN WOE
 
TRAUM KLANGSCHWANGVORBEI-Dream swung by -TRAUM,' SPRPFIFFCHWANG VORBEISCHWANG SCHWANG ALL'VORBEIDream swept byDream swung byTRAUM VORBEI -Dream goneALL IST VORBEI -All is goneUNDWIE NUN SO IST NUN ALLES VORBEIWhy is now all gone past[It is all] over -DARHIERAUF IST ALLES VORBEIThereupon all has passedALLES IST VORBEIEverything is gone LO
 
?? SPUKGESTALT ZERONNEN GLÜCK SPRANG ZERRONNEN - GLÜCK KLANG SPRANGRANG RANG ZERRONNEN -Happiness sprung dissolved -Apparition dissolved -Happiness sprungGLÜCK' BEGONNEN -Happiness rang, dissolved DIESPUKGESTALT ZERONNEN -GLÜCK KLANG - ZERONNEN -ZERRONNEN DER TRAUM ZERRONNENWIE EIN GEBILDWIE EIN GEBILD ZERRONNENDissolved the dream Like an apparition dissolvedApparition dissolved -SPUK?? GEBILD ZERONNENSpectre faded awayHAB[I] HaveHEHE LOVE LOVE LoveLIKISS SUNSUN SUN RAYSLOVEHEHe
 
Dissolved
 
SUN LOVEGLIEDER SCHWER BLEI - Limbs heavy lead - Limbs heavy lead.Limbs - lead.GLIEDER' SCHWERGLIEDER SCHWER' BLEIGLIEDER - KALT - BLEI -GLEIDER - KALT BLEI Limbs - cold lead. SINDDIE GLIEDER MIR SCHWER WIE BLEIWIE EIN HIRNGES PINHSTDIE DIE GLIEDER SIND SCHWER WIEVON BLEIAre limbs heavy like lead[My] limbs are as heavy as leadBLEIGLIEDER SIND BLEI - ALTLead-limbs - old

DICHCome to CAME Came TO - Came SHONE RAY LOVE WHEELED CAME TO LOVE THEECAME TO LOVEc
These lines and words in English appear, all crossed out, at the bottom of a version of the poem in German. Their random order reflects a possible brainstorming cluster that can be associated with many versions within the general complex.
 
From the blood vessel tree the bitterVOM ADER??BAUM DAS BITTREVOM ADERBAUM DAS BITTREVOM ADERBAUM DAS BITTREOf veintree coldFrom the blood vessel tree the bitterEs istSOSEHR KALT IST ESDASS ICH ZITTREES IST SO KALTBIN ICHDASS WON ICHICH ZITTREAm I - - I shudderWEIS - EIS -IceEIS IN SCHNEEIce in snowSo cold it is, I shudderLIEBLove TORE Tore Tore CLIPPED
RIPPED
RIPPEDPASTDREAM TORE PASTDREAM RANGPURREDSIFTED WALKED PASTDREAM TORE PAST
 
INIce -Ice -GEWONNEN -

You -

SPOKE RAY RAY - SPICE PAST Past -WOE
 
SPICEDB B RIMFLASH BRIM SPICED BLOWNSCHNEE -Snow -TRAUMDream PAST Past WOE LOWOE WOE
 
BRIM KISS SPICEHERZ HERZ -Heart -BRICHT AB DUMPFThe heart contracts -HERZ BRICHT AB IM LEIB IN DEM LEIBHeart breaks off in my bodyHeart breaks offHERZ IM GELDES BLUTHERZ IM BLUTHeart in bloodHeart in money's bloodHERZ BRICHT ABHERZ BRICHT AUS DEMVOMLEIBAB Heart breaks offDAS HERZ VEREIST IM LEIBMEINDAS HERZ ERFRIERTVEREIST IM LEIBThe heart turns to ice in my bodyMy heart turns to ice inside [my body]KLANGRang BLOWN BLOWN Blown BLOWING * BLOWNGINGBLOWING Blown ROSE ROSE ROSEROSEROSEROSE
 
SCHRUMFTKALT - DEIN
 
IMVORBEI -Past -PETROSE ROSE Petrose Rose SPRAYEARTHHEART ROSE ROSEROSEBLOODBlown BLOWN
 
Rose BLOWN BLUT BLUT -Blood -

HAPPINESS SPRANG SCATTERED SPILLED RUNNING LEFTGLÜCK BlissREELED
 
WEH - This -DASThatHurt that does.DAS MACHT DAS [. . .] BITTRE IM MEINEM BLUTADER NETZ - DAS BITTRE That does the [. . .] bitterIn [my] vein-net -- the bitterSPRANGBurstPET WAY ' WAY - WAY Way CAST .MEMBERS HEAVY CASTFROM LEAD CASTAWAY IT CASTWOE
 
DAS Does -TUTDoesZERRONNEN - Melted away - CAST CAST Cast -.

BLUSH SPILLEDWOEWOE SO WOE SOBLOODVEIN BLOWN
 
VEIN BRIMBRIM BLOWNKALTVEIN BLOWN SMART SPILLED TUT! GLIEDERLimbsKISS FRAYED

FRAYED
RUSHBLOWN !Rushblown!BLOWN

BRIM BLOWNBLOOD RUSH BLUSH BLOOD BLOWN
WEH.Hurt
 
BLOOD SPICE c
This is one of the few notes that the Baroness adds in cursive. These additions only appear in this version.
ISTSLAIN SPILL SHILLEDDOH! THATAGONE !AGONEAgeone! A-gone! a
(FROM: GOING)
WEH - Hurt -SCHWERHeavy WOE SMART
 
BLAST c
This is one of the few notes that the Baroness adds in cursive. These additions only appear in this version.
CHILL HEARTDAS.VEIN SMART SPICEBRIMPROUDRimproudBLEI.

Lead

LIGHTBLOODHEART KISSKISS WOE BETRAYEDBEFTRAYED BETRAYED

- - -
OHN DICHEIN SONNENBLUTSCHEIN GESTALT - Without your sun-figure BLUTSONN ICHBlood-sun, without youDASS ICH OHN DICH VERBLEIBBLUTSONNE - ICH ERZITTREBLUTSONN OHN DICH - ICH ZITTREBloodsun- I am tremblingThat I remain without youOHN DICH BLUTSONN ICH ZITTREWithout you Bloodsun, I trembleBlood-sun without you - [I] shiver
 
WAS KALT ISTKALTCold WEH DAS TUT

SPILLEDIS BLOWN IS SMARTITItEISIceICE IN SNOWSPICE ICE WOELO! LOBUT - LO BUT - LO LO Lo !

BETRAYED BUT -Toward [my] graveIN'S GRAB.

ZITT'RE OHN DICH ZUM GRAB ICH
KALTI head towards [my] grave

 
BLEIB
 
[Knowledge] sun-songERKENNTNISS SONNSANG OHN DEIN GESTALT[Without your Being's] radianceVASTPAIN BLEIBLEIDStay Pain

SHONE SHONE !Shone !SHONEINIn ICY ICY FROZE RED CHILLIN SNOWICY Icy WARTWARTWIRB - STIRB -Court - die -DASS
Alternate spelling: DAS
ICH OHN DICH VERBLEIB
That I without you remain
 
SHONEc
This is one of the few notes that the Baroness adds in cursive. These additions only appear in this version.
WOEWIRB - STIRB NUN HAB ICH DICH LIEB GEWONNENNow I have come to love youREDNOW VASTAVAST -AvastAVASTSCHNEE -Snow - WART Wart WARTSMART c
The word "wart" may be a play on "wert" -- "icy / [you] were / [you] froze . . ." that Freytag-Loringhoven adapted later as a metaphor for "heart."
WIRB - STIRB -Court - die -
 
DOG
 
VAST
 
RED AVASTWIRB - STIRB WILLDASS
Alternate spelling: DAS
SO IST NUN ALLES VORBEI
That is now all gone
ISATONE -Atone -FROZEHEARTFROZE FROZEFROZEFroze FROZE FROZE LONE SHRUNKHERZHeart HEART HEART HEARTICH FÜR IHN IMMERI for him always
 
BLOOD AGONE BLOOD HEARTFROZEIMMER AlwaysHEPAINSPILLED HEARTINInIN WOEWoefullWOEFROZEFroze ARIDKISSES BLOODICH DEIN - DU MEINI yours - you mine
 
Heart -EARTH
 
SHONEc
This is one of the few notes that the Baroness adds in cursive. These additions only appear in this version.
AGONE
FÜR IMMERForever FROZE -
 
BRIMPROUD ICH DEIN -I yours -ATONEWOEFULLIMInWOEFULL FLAYED FLAYED SHORN SLAIN TORN FLAYEDAridARIDHEART-SPILLEDICH - SOMMER WINTER - HERZI - summer winter - heart
 
IT DU MEIN You mineFASTWILLINGANONEFROZE SHILLEDROSES -RosesBLUT -Blood - BLOODHEART

.Heart.HEART
WOE LO SO FLAYED. LIEB LACHEN SCHMERZ - LUST - WEINENLove lust - laughter pain
 
LONE
 
HEART HEARTSHOWNE IMMERForeverINFLUSH -Flush -- - - -- - - -TODNOT - MICHDeath - me
 
LASTICH - SOMMER - WINTER - I - summer - winterROSESESTRIM TrimSHORNWEH -Hurt -MORGEN KÜSS WIEDERTomorrow kiss again
 
TO LAST AVAST HERZ Heart -SOWNBF LUFFSH
LUSHBLO
E 'NOUGH'NoughDAS -That -TORNVASTROT ICH DICHRed I you n
A possible reading of this line could be "Tomorrow [I] kiss you red again" but the Baroness is playing in this version with who is kissing whom.
 
HE LOVE DOESQUAL STRAHLPain rayANONESHL ILLEDTOToTUT! Does! ALLES GESCHIEHT[All happens]
 
WILLTRIMLIEB Love's torment
 
ENOUGHLUST - LACHEN - SCHMERZSRAHL NOT -Lust - [laughter - hurt]KILLEDBLAST -Blast -ININ MEINEM ARMEN ALLHAND[In my arms] In mine hand
 
ATONE TO AVASTMICH -Me -TILLTillGESCHIEHT ALL ALLSPOTT GLÜCK Happens happiness
 
BLAST CRASH BLAST

MORGEN KÜSS WIEDERWIEDER ROTTomorrow kiss again redLONELAST -CLAST LASTHEIL PEST SPOTTSalvation - plague - jest
 
TILLICH DICH - WIEDERI youHUSHHushAM ZENIT STEHT ICHIn the zenith stand
 
LAST HUSHIN MEIN HANDFLÄCHTELLERGESCHIEHTWACHSTIn my palm [happens] growsOVERCASTOvercast -ICHFEST GOTTI fast God
 
?? BLUFF LAST LAST HUSHGLÜCK - HEIL - PEST SPOTTHappiness - salvation - jest - plagueGRIMGrim
 
OVERCASTMIT FEST[In the zenith] with firmLOVE .Love .
 
. . AM ZENIT FESTa
GOTT = MAN x WEIB = ALLEINS = ANFANG ?? NICHTS ALL WAS DAZWISCHEN ??LIGHT DAS IST VOM ÜBEL. [This addition is discussed in the introduction and shown in Figure 8.
 
GRIMSTEHT
 
LOVE ICH GOTT Stood God: I -
 
E.E.v.FLc
The small fragment at the bottom of the page is not a version of this poem:
GELD IST DASEIN [Money is Being]
GELD MUSS DASEIN [Money must be there]
ZUM DASEIN [for Being]
It continues with a variety of endings concerning death.
 
V.
 
F.
 
L.

 
CAME TO LOVEUP
 
HELIALO BLOWN -
 
VEIN KISS SMELL RED
 
SPILLED
 
DREAM TORE WALKED PASTVEIN FROZEBLOOD
 
SHILLED
 
BLOOD RED TRAILED SWEPT DROPPEDFROZE
 
VAST
 
. . . .FROMLEAD CAST AWAY, IT CAST
 
ICY IN SNOW ICE IN SNOW
 
HEART IN WOE IN WOE
 
FROZE FROZE
 
HEART HEART

"HE" AND "FIRSTLING"
THESE TWO POEMS ARE SAME. I LEAVE IT TO YOU - IF YOU WILL PRINT BOTH? WITH THAT
 
"FLAYED HEART -
 
FROZE - - -.

I CONSIDER IT SINGULAR STRONG ENOUGH - TO COUNTENANCE THE SHRIVELING OF THE HEART TO THE SEMBLANCE AND USELESS APENDIX
Alternate spelling: APPENDIX
OF THE HEART.
(IN HERE: "BLOWN"
BETTER? "BLOWN"
ROSE
INSTEAD OF
"BLOWING ?

ROSE?"
IT IS GREAT DIFFERENCE
IN SOUND AND MEANING.
IN ATTITUDE.
BLOWING IS ROMANTIC
BLOWN IS FACT
I THINK: BLOWN!
AM UNCERTAIN.
DECIDE.
IT IS SAME POEM. PRINT BOTH - OR ONE OF THEM - WICH
Alternate spelling: WHICH
ONE - YOU MUST SELECT.
GLÜCK SPRANGSCHWANG VORBEI
TRÄUME -- BEGONNEN
GLÜCK TRAUM BEGONNEN
Happiness swung by
[Blissdreams]
Dreams begun

Happiness . . . begun
3 Heart
2 Shilled
VAST
1 ICE
 
SLAINREDTO
 
BLASTBLOWNBED
 
ANONEFROMRED
 
TILLVEINKISSES
 
LASTHOW SPILLED
 
??VAST FROZE
 
??IS BED SHILLED FROZE
 
TRIM PAIN

FROZE KILLED VASTICE
 
THATS VAST
 
HIMLONE
 
TRIMFROZE
 
ENOUGHBEDFLASH
 
GRIM GRIMSPILLED
 
BLUFF LOVERED
 
LOVE TO BLASTFROZE

 
BLAST BEDFLASH
 
TILL LAST SPILLED
 
BLUFF RED
 
OVERCAST FROZE
 
BRIMMING

 
RED
 
SPILLED
 
VEIN

 
HEART
 
SPILLED
 
RED
 
SHILLED
 
FROZE
 
KILLED
 
LONE
 
VAST

 
BED
 
SPILLED
 
RED
 
FROZE
 
FROZE
 
ICE

DJUNA - I SEND YOU THIS - YOU WILL SCARCELY RECOGNIZE IT - THE ENGLISH WAS SUCH MISSTEP THAT ONLY CAN HAPPEN HERE - IN GERMANY WHERE I AM FLUSTERED FRUSTRATED - BY PROFOUND SCARE - UNREST. WITH ALMOST SUPERHUMAN LABOR - MISERY - I FIXED IT - FOR I WAS ASHAMED - ANXIOUS. I CAN NOT LAST THUS LONG - DJUNA! AND YET - I HAVE NO MESSAGE - YET! A POEM LIKD THAT - THOUGH FAULTLESS NOW - SHOULD NOT COST ME SO DEAR! THE GERMAN - FIRST VERSION - ALWAYS WAS TOUCHING PATHETIC NAIV - FINISHED. WHAT IS INTERRESTING
Alternate spelling: INTERESTING
ABOUT THE 2 TOGETHER- IS THEIR VAST DIFFERENCE OF EMOTION - TIME KNOWLEDGE - PAIN. THAT IS - WHY THEY SHOULD BE PRINTED TOGETHER.
FOR THEY ARE 1 + 2 THE SAME POEM - PERSON - SENTIMENT LIFE STRETCH BETWEEN ONE - DIVIDED - ASSEMBLED - DISSEMBLED. THE GERMAN ONE RIPE - EXPERIENCED - BITTER. THE GERMAN ONE IS RAW DEEP WOE OF CHILD - IN WHOMS VERY VERY VIOLENCE THUS NAIVE EXPRESSED - LINGERS BALM OF RECOVERY SENSIBLE - THE ENGLISH ONE - AS IS SUPERFLUOUS TO POINT OUT - IS GRIM - SOPHISTICATED.
YES DJUNA - IT IS THAT "WOEFULL WART" POOR DEAR SUFFERING FRIEND! I COULD BURST OUT LAUGHING - IF IT WERE NOT SO TRULY FIGURATIVE IN ITS VERY DISTORTION! FOR - THAT NOW - HERE - IS MY HEART. IT IS INDECENT TO BEHOLD.
HOW IS SWEET DEAR LITTLE SARAH FREEMAN?
SHE DID NOT WRITE. OH! KISS HER.
XWitness
HEFIRSTFIRST BORN.ERSTLING KLANG.
LOVE.
LoveERSTE LIEBE.CHESTHEARTAPENDICITIS
Alternate spelling: APPENDICITIS
FirstlingHeFIRSTLING HEERSTLINGFIRSTLINGErstling
c
This whole version is lightly crossed out on the manuscript page. To increase legibility, we have chosen to show those words in the transcript that the Baroness deleted before she crossed out the entire version.
 
OR:FIRST LOVE.
 
HAB DICH LIEB GEWONNEN -HAB 'DICH' LIEB'HAB DICH LIEB GEWONNEN - GEWONNENHAB DICHDICH LIEB DICH GEWONNEN - [I] have come to love you -Now I have come to love youNUN SOHAB ICH DICH LIEB GEWONNEN NUN HAB ICH DICH LIEB GEWONNEN WOE
 
TRAUM KLANGSCHWANGVORBEI-Dream swung by -TRAUM,' SPRPFIFFCHWANG VORBEISCHWANG SCHWANG ALL'VORBEIDream swept byDream swung byTRAUM VORBEI -Dream goneALL IST VORBEI -All is goneUNDWIE NUN SO IST NUN ALLES VORBEIWhy is now all gone past[It is all] over -DARHIERAUF IST ALLES VORBEIThereupon all has passedALLES IST VORBEIEverything is gone LO
 
?? SPUKGESTALT ZERONNEN GLÜCK SPRANG ZERRONNEN - GLÜCK KLANG SPRANGRANG RANG ZERRONNEN -Happiness sprung dissolved -Apparition dissolved -Happiness sprungGLÜCK' BEGONNEN -Happiness rang, dissolved DIESPUKGESTALT ZERONNEN -GLÜCK KLANG - ZERONNEN -ZERRONNEN DER TRAUM ZERRONNENWIE EIN GEBILDWIE EIN GEBILD ZERRONNENDissolved the dream Like an apparition dissolvedApparition dissolved -SPUK?? GEBILD ZERONNENSpectre faded awayHAB[I] HaveHEHE LOVE LOVE LoveLIKISS SUNSUN SUN RAYSLOVEHEHe
 
Dissolved
 
SUN LOVEGLIEDER SCHWER BLEI - Limbs heavy lead - Limbs heavy lead.Limbs - lead.GLIEDER' SCHWERGLIEDER SCHWER' BLEIGLIEDER - KALT - BLEI -GLEIDER - KALT BLEI Limbs - cold lead. SINDDIE GLIEDER MIR SCHWER WIE BLEIWIE EIN HIRNGES PINHSTDIE DIE GLIEDER SIND SCHWER WIEVON BLEIAre limbs heavy like lead[My] limbs are as heavy as leadBLEIGLIEDER SIND BLEI - ALTLead-limbs - old

DICHCome to CAME Came TO - Came SHONE RAY LOVE WHEELED CAME TO LOVE THEECAME TO LOVEc
These lines and words in English appear, all crossed out, at the bottom of a version of the poem in German. Their random order reflects a possible brainstorming cluster that can be associated with many versions within the general complex.
 
From the blood vessel tree the bitterVOM ADER??BAUM DAS BITTREVOM ADERBAUM DAS BITTREVOM ADERBAUM DAS BITTREOf veintree coldFrom the blood vessel tree the bitterEs istSOSEHR KALT IST ESDASS ICH ZITTREES IST SO KALTBIN ICHDASS WON ICHICH ZITTREAm I - - I shudderWEIS - EIS -IceEIS IN SCHNEEIce in snowSo cold it is, I shudderLIEBLove TORE Tore Tore CLIPPED
RIPPED
RIPPEDPASTDREAM TORE PASTDREAM RANGPURREDSIFTED WALKED PASTDREAM TORE PAST
 
INIce -Ice -GEWONNEN -

You -

SPOKE RAY RAY - SPICE PAST Past -WOE
 
SPICEDB B RIMFLASH BRIM SPICED BLOWNSCHNEE -Snow -TRAUMDream PAST Past WOE LOWOE WOE
 
BRIM KISS SPICEHERZ HERZ -Heart -BRICHT AB DUMPFThe heart contracts -HERZ BRICHT AB IM LEIB IN DEM LEIBHeart breaks off in my bodyHeart breaks offHERZ IM GELDES BLUTHERZ IM BLUTHeart in bloodHeart in money's bloodHERZ BRICHT ABHERZ BRICHT AUS DEMVOMLEIBAB Heart breaks offDAS HERZ VEREIST IM LEIBMEINDAS HERZ ERFRIERTVEREIST IM LEIBThe heart turns to ice in my bodyMy heart turns to ice inside [my body]KLANGRang BLOWN BLOWN Blown BLOWING * BLOWNGINGBLOWING Blown ROSE ROSE ROSEROSEROSEROSE
 
SCHRUMFTKALT - DEIN
 
IMVORBEI -Past -PETROSE ROSE Petrose Rose SPRAYEARTHHEART ROSE ROSEROSEBLOODBlown BLOWN
 
Rose BLOWN BLUT BLUT -Blood -

HAPPINESS SPRANG SCATTERED SPILLED RUNNING LEFTGLÜCK BlissREELED
 
WEH - This -DASThatHurt that does.DAS MACHT DAS [. . .] BITTRE IM MEINEM BLUTADER NETZ - DAS BITTRE That does the [. . .] bitterIn [my] vein-net -- the bitterSPRANGBurstPET WAY ' WAY - WAY Way CAST .MEMBERS HEAVY CASTFROM LEAD CASTAWAY IT CASTWOE
 
DAS Does -TUTDoesZERRONNEN - Melted away - CAST CAST Cast -.

BLUSH SPILLEDWOEWOE SO WOE SOBLOODVEIN BLOWN
 
VEIN BRIMBRIM BLOWNKALTVEIN BLOWN SMART SPILLED TUT! GLIEDERLimbsKISS FRAYED

FRAYED
RUSHBLOWN !Rushblown!BLOWN

BRIM BLOWNBLOOD RUSH BLUSH BLOOD BLOWN
WEH.Hurt
 
BLOOD SPICE c
This is one of the few notes that the Baroness adds in cursive. These additions only appear in this version.
ISTSLAIN SPILL SHILLEDDOH! THATAGONE !AGONEAgeone! A-gone! a
(FROM: GOING)
WEH - Hurt -SCHWERHeavy WOE SMART
 
BLAST c
This is one of the few notes that the Baroness adds in cursive. These additions only appear in this version.
CHILL HEARTDAS.VEIN SMART SPICEBRIMPROUDRimproudBLEI.

Lead

LIGHTBLOODHEART KISSKISS WOE BETRAYEDBEFTRAYED BETRAYED

- - -
OHN DICHEIN SONNENBLUTSCHEIN GESTALT - Without your sun-figure BLUTSONN ICHBlood-sun, without youDASS ICH OHN DICH VERBLEIBBLUTSONNE - ICH ERZITTREBLUTSONN OHN DICH - ICH ZITTREBloodsun- I am tremblingThat I remain without youOHN DICH BLUTSONN ICH ZITTREWithout you Bloodsun, I trembleBlood-sun without you - [I] shiver
 
WAS KALT ISTKALTCold WEH DAS TUT

SPILLEDIS BLOWN IS SMARTITItEISIceICE IN SNOWSPICE ICE WOELO! LOBUT - LO BUT - LO LO Lo !

BETRAYED BUT -Toward [my] graveIN'S GRAB.

ZITT'RE OHN DICH ZUM GRAB ICH
KALTI head towards [my] grave

 
BLEIB
 
[Knowledge] sun-songERKENNTNISS SONNSANG OHN DEIN GESTALT[Without your Being's] radianceVASTPAIN BLEIBLEIDStay Pain

SHONE SHONE !Shone !SHONEINIn ICY ICY FROZE RED CHILLIN SNOWICY Icy WARTWARTWIRB - STIRB -Court - die -DASS
Alternate spelling: DAS
ICH OHN DICH VERBLEIB
That I without you remain
 
SHONEc
This is one of the few notes that the Baroness adds in cursive. These additions only appear in this version.
WOEWIRB - STIRB NUN HAB ICH DICH LIEB GEWONNENNow I have come to love youREDNOW VASTAVAST -AvastAVASTSCHNEE -Snow - WART Wart WARTSMART c
The word "wart" may be a play on "wert" -- "icy / [you] were / [you] froze . . ." that Freytag-Loringhoven adapted later as a metaphor for "heart."
WIRB - STIRB -Court - die -
 
DOG
 
VAST
 
RED AVASTWIRB - STIRB WILLDASS
Alternate spelling: DAS
SO IST NUN ALLES VORBEI
That is now all gone
ISATONE -Atone -FROZEHEARTFROZE FROZEFROZEFroze FROZE FROZE LONE SHRUNKHERZHeart HEART HEART HEARTICH FÜR IHN IMMERI for him always
 
BLOOD AGONE BLOOD HEARTFROZEIMMER AlwaysHEPAINSPILLED HEARTINInIN WOEWoefullWOEFROZEFroze ARIDKISSES BLOODICH DEIN - DU MEINI yours - you mine
 
Heart -EARTH
 
SHONEc
This is one of the few notes that the Baroness adds in cursive. These additions only appear in this version.
AGONE
FÜR IMMERForever FROZE -
 
BRIMPROUD ICH DEIN -I yours -ATONEWOEFULLIMInWOEFULL FLAYED FLAYED SHORN SLAIN TORN FLAYEDAridARIDHEART-SPILLEDICH - SOMMER WINTER - HERZI - summer winter - heart
 
IT DU MEIN You mineFASTWILLINGANONEFROZE SHILLEDROSES -RosesBLUT -Blood - BLOODHEART

.Heart.HEART
WOE LO SO FLAYED. LIEB LACHEN SCHMERZ - LUST - WEINENLove lust - laughter pain
 
LONE
 
HEART HEARTSHOWNE IMMERForeverINFLUSH -Flush -- - - -- - - -TODNOT - MICHDeath - me
 
LASTICH - SOMMER - WINTER - I - summer - winterROSESESTRIM TrimSHORNWEH -Hurt -MORGEN KÜSS WIEDERTomorrow kiss again
 
TO LAST AVAST HERZ Heart -SOWNBF LUFFSH
LUSHBLO
E 'NOUGH'NoughDAS -That -TORNVASTROT ICH DICHRed I you n
A possible reading of this line could be "Tomorrow [I] kiss you red again" but the Baroness is playing in this version with who is kissing whom.
 
HE LOVE DOESQUAL STRAHLPain rayANONESHL ILLEDTOToTUT! Does! ALLES GESCHIEHT[All happens]
 
WILLTRIMLIEB Love's torment
 
ENOUGHLUST - LACHEN - SCHMERZSRAHL NOT -Lust - [laughter - hurt]KILLEDBLAST -Blast -ININ MEINEM ARMEN ALLHAND[In my arms] In mine hand
 
ATONE TO AVASTMICH -Me -TILLTillGESCHIEHT ALL ALLSPOTT GLÜCK Happens happiness
 
BLAST CRASH BLAST

MORGEN KÜSS WIEDERWIEDER ROTTomorrow kiss again redLONELAST -CLAST LASTHEIL PEST SPOTTSalvation - plague - jest
 
TILLICH DICH - WIEDERI youHUSHHushAM ZENIT STEHT ICHIn the zenith stand
 
LAST HUSHIN MEIN HANDFLÄCHTELLERGESCHIEHTWACHSTIn my palm [happens] growsOVERCASTOvercast -ICHFEST GOTTI fast God
 
?? BLUFF LAST LAST HUSHGLÜCK - HEIL - PEST SPOTTHappiness - salvation - jest - plagueGRIMGrim
 
OVERCASTMIT FEST[In the zenith] with firmLOVE .Love .
 
. . AM ZENIT FESTa
GOTT = MAN x WEIB = ALLEINS = ANFANG ?? NICHTS ALL WAS DAZWISCHEN ??LIGHT DAS IST VOM ÜBEL. [This addition is discussed in the introduction and shown in Figure 8.
 
GRIMSTEHT
 
LOVE ICH GOTT Stood God: I -
 
E.E.v.FLc
The small fragment at the bottom of the page is not a version of this poem:
GELD IST DASEIN [Money is Being]
GELD MUSS DASEIN [Money must be there]
ZUM DASEIN [for Being]
It continues with a variety of endings concerning death.
 
V.
 
F.
 
L.

 
CAME TO LOVEUP
 
HELIALO BLOWN -
 
VEIN KISS SMELL RED
 
SPILLED
 
DREAM TORE WALKED PASTVEIN FROZEBLOOD
 
SHILLED
 
BLOOD RED TRAILED SWEPT DROPPEDFROZE
 
VAST
 
. . . .FROMLEAD CAST AWAY, IT CAST
 
ICY IN SNOW ICE IN SNOW
 
HEART IN WOE IN WOE
 
FROZE FROZE
 
HEART HEART

"HE" AND "FIRSTLING"
THESE TWO POEMS ARE SAME. I LEAVE IT TO YOU - IF YOU WILL PRINT BOTH? WITH THAT
 
"FLAYED HEART -
 
FROZE - - -.

I CONSIDER IT SINGULAR STRONG ENOUGH - TO COUNTENANCE THE SHRIVELING OF THE HEART TO THE SEMBLANCE AND USELESS APENDIX
Alternate spelling: APPENDIX
OF THE HEART.
(IN HERE: "BLOWN"
BETTER? "BLOWN"
ROSE
INSTEAD OF
"BLOWING ?

ROSE?"
IT IS GREAT DIFFERENCE
IN SOUND AND MEANING.
IN ATTITUDE.
BLOWING IS ROMANTIC
BLOWN IS FACT
I THINK: BLOWN!
AM UNCERTAIN.
DECIDE.
IT IS SAME POEM. PRINT BOTH - OR ONE OF THEM - WICH
Alternate spelling: WHICH
ONE - YOU MUST SELECT.
GLÜCK SPRANGSCHWANG VORBEI
TRÄUME -- BEGONNEN
GLÜCK TRAUM BEGONNEN
Happiness swung by
[Blissdreams]
Dreams begun

Happiness . . . begun
3 Heart
2 Shilled
VAST
1 ICE
 
SLAINREDTO
 
BLASTBLOWNBED
 
ANONEFROMRED
 
TILLVEINKISSES
 
LASTHOW SPILLED
 
??VAST FROZE
 
??IS BED SHILLED FROZE
 
TRIM PAIN

FROZE KILLED VASTICE
 
THATS VAST
 
HIMLONE
 
TRIMFROZE
 
ENOUGHBEDFLASH
 
GRIM GRIMSPILLED
 
BLUFF LOVERED
 
LOVE TO BLASTFROZE

 
BLAST BEDFLASH
 
TILL LAST SPILLED
 
BLUFF RED
 
OVERCAST FROZE
 
BRIMMING

 
RED
 
SPILLED
 
VEIN

 
HEART
 
SPILLED
 
RED
 
SHILLED
 
FROZE
 
KILLED
 
LONE
 
VAST

 
BED
 
SPILLED
 
RED
 
FROZE
 
FROZE
 
ICE

DJUNA - I SEND YOU THIS - YOU WILL SCARCELY RECOGNIZE IT - THE ENGLISH WAS SUCH MISSTEP THAT ONLY CAN HAPPEN HERE - IN GERMANY WHERE I AM FLUSTERED FRUSTRATED - BY PROFOUND SCARE - UNREST. WITH ALMOST SUPERHUMAN LABOR - MISERY - I FIXED IT - FOR I WAS ASHAMED - ANXIOUS. I CAN NOT LAST THUS LONG - DJUNA! AND YET - I HAVE NO MESSAGE - YET! A POEM LIKD THAT - THOUGH FAULTLESS NOW - SHOULD NOT COST ME SO DEAR! THE GERMAN - FIRST VERSION - ALWAYS WAS TOUCHING PATHETIC NAIV - FINISHED. WHAT IS INTERRESTING
Alternate spelling: INTERESTING
ABOUT THE 2 TOGETHER- IS THEIR VAST DIFFERENCE OF EMOTION - TIME KNOWLEDGE - PAIN. THAT IS - WHY THEY SHOULD BE PRINTED TOGETHER.
FOR THEY ARE 1 + 2 THE SAME POEM - PERSON - SENTIMENT LIFE STRETCH BETWEEN ONE - DIVIDED - ASSEMBLED - DISSEMBLED. THE GERMAN ONE RIPE - EXPERIENCED - BITTER. THE GERMAN ONE IS RAW DEEP WOE OF CHILD - IN WHOMS VERY VERY VIOLENCE THUS NAIVE EXPRESSED - LINGERS BALM OF RECOVERY SENSIBLE - THE ENGLISH ONE - AS IS SUPERFLUOUS TO POINT OUT - IS GRIM - SOPHISTICATED.
YES DJUNA - IT IS THAT "WOEFULL WART" POOR DEAR SUFFERING FRIEND! I COULD BURST OUT LAUGHING - IF IT WERE NOT SO TRULY FIGURATIVE IN ITS VERY DISTORTION! FOR - THAT NOW - HERE - IS MY HEART. IT IS INDECENT TO BEHOLD.
HOW IS SWEET DEAR LITTLE SARAH FREEMAN?
SHE DID NOT WRITE. OH! KISS HER.

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